Food and sex, sex and food. The two are inexorably intertwined. Both can evoke a sinful amount of pleasure tantalizing all of your senses, taking special advantage of aromas, flavors and textures. We’re all intimately familiar with the sensation of rich chocolate slowly melting on your tongue, or biting into the perfect peach, sweet juice exploding into your mouth and dripping from your lips. Really phenomenal sex can enlighten, break boundaries and take you to states previously unknown and you know what? So can an incredible sauce..
Great chefs simply must know that they posses this raw sexual power, seducing you into their realities, causing shudders and cries of delight in the dining room, all the while never leaving the kitchen. But do they know their hidden potential? Do they even realize that they could enter an entirely different arena and make gobs of dough with considerably less effort? Two words: Body sauce.
For example, I wonder if Chef John Harris is keen to how subversively sexy his Alaskan King Crab Claw appetizer really is. Though the crab claw meat has its own musky sweetness, I'm privy to the confessions of several Lilette diners (especially women) who enjoyed the passion fruit butter that is served with the crab so much, that they have expressed a sincere desire to rub it all over their own body. Personally, I'd prefer drizzling the sweet, buttery sauce across my lover's naked flesh and then slowly lick him clean. Why let him get all the good stuff? Afterward we can share finger-fulls of Lilette's Nutella Custard with caramel cream.
MoPho, a Vietnamese/Creole eatery created by Chef Micheal Gullotta has enjoyed a rush of excited diners since it's opening a few weeks ago and they keep coming back. Admittedly, once you get a glimpse (not to mention a taste) of the whole, fried redfish or the Shakin Beef Cheeks vermicelli bowl, you'll undoubtedly plan a return trip, but I believe there is something else beguiling repeat diners. On the menu, the Crispy Chicken Wings seem so innocent, so simple. Set before you, you'll notice the wings resting in thick, viscous sauce made with lemongrass and ginger. If you're smart, you'll covet every drop, sucking the remnants from your fingertips. Perhaps Gullotta can be convinced to bottle it?
Finally, Chef Greg Sonnier has a sexy secret up his sleeve, a stunner that he hides in the background at his latest domain, Kingfish. Sure, the French Quarter restaurant on Chartres Street offers plenty of libidinous dishes like Butternut Squash Lobster Bisque with Caribbean lobster and crème fraiche or the Cochon de Lait Pot Pie, but I know of one small item that will surely turn you on. You might not notice it among all the other mouth-watering options, but lurking amidst the sides is the Guava Butter Garlic Fries. They seems harmless, they're just French fries after all, how mind-blowing could they possibly be? Let's just say that the resulting foodgasm you experience from the guava garlic butter sauce is one you won't soon forget.